I've been watching some videos from Gabor Maté, and one of the parts that is interesting for me is about how childhood trauma creates our adult selves. It took a long time for me to understand that my childhood was extremely difficult because I felt rejected by everybody; in school, in sports, and even by my own father. Not rejected as in I was unclaimed, but rejected as in my mistakes were belittled by anger and personal attacks, or my presence was rejected as in my teammates or classmates did not want to accept me as teammates or classmates. Even when I would excel at school or at sports, my life was destroyed by an inability to be accepted.
Now I am trying to get my life together, even though it seems far too late.
The book is Axel Madsen's Hearts and Minds about Sartre and de Beauvoir.
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